If you could throw knives or not throw knives...

Last weekend was the 5 Year Reunion for BC 2002, and man oh man - it was like flashbacks to college all over the place. In fact, I think it was even more ridiculous than most of college. It was like if you took four years of school and concentrated them down into two and a half days... and then added in cops that didn't get a rat's ass about preventing any crimes except for that which could be potentially caused by a large balloon.
You heard me. A large balloon was the biggest deal in the BC cops' world Saturday night. See, there was a guy from the 10 Year Reunion hanging out in front of Walsh with an obviously stolen decorative balloon, much too large to make it through the double doors of Walsh, tethered to the guy by a long string of flags (a la a Used Car lot). Sometime around midnight, well after the balloon made its first appearance, a cop walked past and stopped to yell at him - some sample dialogue:

Cop: You need to get rid of that balloon.
10 Yr Guy: Why?
Cop: It's a hazard. It could take down a helicopter.
[Seriously. The cop was concerned about helicopters. The balloon reached to, maybe, the fourth floor of Walsh. Maybe.]
10 Yr. Guy: If a helicopter is low enough to hit this balloon, I think we have bigger things to worry about.
Cop: I'm not kidding. You could cause an accident if you let that go.
10 Yr. Guy: I won't let it go.
Cop: Well, if something does happen, who should I come looking for?

At this point, the guy totally gives him his name and room number, in possibly the most exasperated voice I have ever heard. Meanwhile, all around the cop, there are at least two dozen people blatantly breaking open container laws, and there is a group of probably ten people attempting to break into a Mod. Excellent police work, guys. Well done.
But, the balloon also led to the big question of the night, thanks to a drunk and very serious Amit - "If you could throw knives or not throw knives, which would you do?"
(Upon more investigation, it appears this question had some kind of context - a mix of wanting to pop the balloon and Brian Haddad's former penchant for actually throwing knives, but at the time, the question was asked with deadly earnestness and no explanation whatsoever. For the record, the correct answer is "throw knives.")

Other highlights:
- A tropical jungle of a theme party at the Plex. I am pretty sure that the "tropical jungle" part was supposed to be "breezy Carribean", but that's what you get for not having fans or AC on the most ridiculously humid day of the year so far...
- Mark V. telling Claire and I about 50 times how his nephew (or maybe Mark himself, the repetition did not make the story more understandable... possibly less, in fact) punched Theos in the face while Theos had cornrows and made Theos cry. Word on the street - guys with cornrows aren't supposed to cry. Theos denies the end result, though he does admit to being punched in the face. (UPDATE: A respected source tells me that Mark does not, in fact, have a nephew. The nephew was, potentially, Dave McGowan's. Or, there was no nephew. Just a little added confusion for what was already a confusing story.)
- Claire meeting Tarek for the first time. How is that even possible?
- Flip cup and beirut tournaments in the 7th and 8th floor lounges until the sun came up. The cop reaction? "Hey, the airconditioning in the 8th floor lounge works better than the 7th... maybe you guys should go up there." The janitor reaction? "I hope you kids enjoyed your reunion."

Lessons learned:
- Busch Light is possibly the most disgusting tasting beer in the history of beer.
- Walsh beds are INSANELY uncomfortable. How did I ever sleep in one sophomore year?
- Bring a fan next time.

Song of the day: Livin' on a Prayer , Bon Jovi
I can't give you a link, but it's clearly the right choice.